I Don't Know If You Noticed But...

lately I have not really been feeling like myself.  I have been sad and tired and easy to anger.  Tonight is a perfect example - although I went to bed early last night (11:30 up at 7:45 - which is a lot of sleep for me) I am pooped.

I flipped out before the Smokies game because Mr. PITA did not want to sit in our regular seats.  Now don't get me wrong this is something that would normally bother me, but I totally overreacted.  Perhaps I should explain - to you not to him.

I sometimes think that I might be a little OCD.  There is just some stuff that I have a really hard time with.  Changing something that is good in my mind is pretty much top of the list.  I need to have my mug for my tea and if anyone ever used it I would feel like the top of my head was going to pop off.  I like to sit in the same seat at the hockey game - I start to get antsy about it around 6:30 (the game starts at 7:30), worrying if anyone is sitting in it.  I cannot sleep if I am not on my side of the bed.  Things like that, just can't handle it. There used to be a long list but I have worked on it, it has gotten better.  Apparently, it is still not good.

That is not all of it though.  Mr. PITA's parents are in town for the birth of the baby and I am really feeling like second fiddle.  Perhaps I have over estimated my worth...  I think that thought is what is what put me over the edge with the hockey game.  Mr. PITA would rather sit at the other side of the arena with his parents than sit with us - all together, as a family. The whole reason that I like going to the game is to spend time with my family.  This particular game - with the parents in from Calgary - I was looking forward to all week.  I realize that it is my problem and I need to get over it - just makes me sad to realize how unimportant we are OR how thoughtless Mr. PITA is about how his actions make us feel.  I say us meaning me and CH but really it is just me.  CH doesn't care, he thinks that it is my habit to feel more important to a person than I actually am only to be crushed when the truth slaps me in the face.

One more thing.  PITA senior - man alive.  It is deep (the bullshit I mean).  He is really insecure with PITA's in-laws and seems to be on a mission to make himself look good.  The things is, all of the crap that comes out of his mouth is so transparent he needs to just relax and let them see him.  HE is a great.  This insecure freak he is being, not so much.

Wow.  I am crrrraaaabbbbyyyy. Sorry.

:o)  Tina

UPDATE:  Jen provided me with the perfect analogy after reading this post.  I feel like a dog who was put outside because company came. Although, today I am kind of over it and maybe we should have just changed seat for that game...